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Donald Swann & Michael Flanders

Transport of Delight

Both: Some folks like a Lagonda, and some a smart MG, Or for bonny army lorry, they'd lay them down and dee.
Such means of locomotion seem rather dull to us,
Swann: The driver...
Flanders: ... and conductor of...
Both: ... a London omnibus!

Hold very tight please, ting ting.
Hold very tight please, ting ting.

Flanders: When you are lost in London, and you don't know where you are,
You'll hear my voice a-calling, "Move further down the car!".
Both: And very soon you'll find yourself inside the terminus,
In a London transport, diesel engine, ninety-seven horsepower omnibus.

Swann: Along the Queen's great highway, I drive my merry load,
At twenty miles per hour in the middle of the road.
Both: We like to drive in conveys, we're most gregarious,
The big six-wheeler, scarlet painted, London transport, diesel engine, ninety-seven horsepower omnibus.

Earth has not anything to show more fair,
Flanders: Mind the stairs, please,
Swann: Mind the stairs...
Flanders: Mind the stairs...
Both: Earth has not anything to show more fair,
Swann: Any more fares?
Flanders: Any more fares, any more fares?

Swann: When cabbies try to pass me before they overtakes,
I sticks me flippin' hand out and I jams on all me brakes.
Flanders: Those jackal taxi drivers can only swear and cuss,
Behind that monarch of the road,
Swann: Observer of the highway code,
Flanders: That big six-wheeler,
Swann: Scarlet painted,
Flanders: London transport,
Swann: Diesel engine,
Both: Ninety-seven horsepower omnibus.

Swann: I stops when I'm requested, although it spoils the ride,
So we can shout,
Flanders: "Get out of it! We're full right up inside".

Both: We don't ask much for wages, we only want fair shares,
So cut down all the stages, and stick up all the fares.
If tickets cost a pound apiece, why should you make a fuss?
Flanders: It's worth it just to ride inside,
Swann: That thirty-foot long by ten-foot wide,
Flanders: Inside that monarch of the road,
Swann: Observer of the highway code,
Both: That big six-wheeler,
Scarlet painted,
London transport,
Diesel engine,
Ninety-seven horsepower,
Ninety-seven horsepower omnibus!

Flanders: Hold very tight, please!

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Thanks to Patrick for submitting the lyrics.

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