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Library's in the skip, board the sinking ship
God save all boneheads

This week on the show, Rachel has to go
Good riddance, bonehead!

Like your choice of hat, and your easy chat
Come and join my guests, yeah you passed the test
You are a bonehead

Craning their necks, cashing their checks
Swabbing the deck down there on the wreck
The way of bonehead

All as white as snow, ego all aglow
Charitable work, Jesus what a berk
I name you bonehead

Haven't thought it through, anything will do
Polishing a turd, shallow's not the word
The word is bonehead

Piss on the fire, cutting the wire
Slashing the tires, stuck in the mire
Just natural bonehead

Missing the point, wrecking the joint
Though it is cruel there is a rule
"Avoid the boneheads!"

Sentimental mist, dewy-eyed and pissed
Lying through your teeth for your own relief
Don't bother, bonehead

Caught in your zip, sinking the ship
Cracking the whip, not getting a grip
La vie en bonehead

Coming on strong, getting it wrong
Shouting the odds and cursing the gods
That made you a bonehead

Anaconda woman and the blue-legged heron
Blue-lipped baby got the blowlamp eye
Hotel room got a closet full of melons
Catapult the alligator one more time
Chuck it in the pot, stick it in the kettle
Put it in the sun, watch the motherfucker shine
Back from the battle with a chest full of medals
Everybody knows that ornament is crime