Smithereens Follow

'Cause Lisa with an 'S' goes 'ssnozz'
It's 'Z' instead of 'S', 'Lie' instead of 'Lee'
It's simple as can be, see, Liza

I'll do it again
It's Liza with 'Z' not Lisa with an 'S'
'Cause Lisa with an 'S' goes 'ssnozz'
It's 'Z' instead of 'S', 'Lie' instead of 'Lee'
It's simple as can be, see, Liza

Now, if my name were Ada
I'd be Ada, even backwards I'd be Ada
Or if my name were Ruth
Then I'd be Ruth because with Ruth what can you do?
Or Sally, or Margaret or Ginger or Faye
But when you're a Liza you always have to say

No, it's Liza with 'Z' not Lisa with an 'S'
'Cause Lisa with an 'S' goes 'ssnozz'
It's 'Z' instead of 'S', 'Lie' instead of 'Lee'
It's simple as can be, see, Liza

Ah, and that is only half of it
There's another way they treat me cruelly
How often I remember someone saying
"There she goes, Lisa Minooli"
Or Minolli or Miniola or Minili Minnilii
So is it a wonder? I very often cry

It's M I double N, then E double L I
You double up the N, that's not me
Then E double L end it with an I
That's the way you say Minnelli
Liza Minnelli, it's Italian
Blame it on papa, what can I do?

Every Sandra who's a Saandra
Every Mary who's really Maree
Every Joan who is a Joanne
Has got to agree with me when I'm announced
I don't mind being pommeled or trampled or trounced
But it does drive you bats to be Miss, mispronounced

It's Liza with 'Z' not Lisa with a 'S'
'Cause Lisa with a 'S' goes 'ssnozz'
It's 'Z' instead of 'S', 'Lie' instead of 'Lee'
It's simple as can be, see, Liza

Then M I double N, then E double L I
You double up the N, that's not me
Then E double L end it with an I
That's the way you say Minnelli
Liza Minnelli, it's easy, it's easy
See it's Leezy, no, Liza

'Cause Lisa with an 'S' goes 'ssnozz'
It's 'Z' instead of 'S', 'Lie' instead of 'Lee'