Tom Paxton Follow

I was strolling ... just walking my pup
I was checking the scene ... seeing what was up
I wasn't bothering nobody ... I was easing on down the road
When just behind me come a piddy piddy pat
I said "Good Lord, tell me what was that
I turned and looked and my brain took an overload

Cause down the trail and around the farm
Came a thousand people with their underwear on
Picking 'em up and layin' 'em down like that
They were puffing and groaning ... faces all red
Their eyes rolled back in their sweatty heads
And, I never saw that many people look that bad

Crying "Come on Harry! Come on Sue
Let's do what the magazines tell us to
We'll get ourselves in shape the fashionable way
Twenty-five laps around the pond ...
will make us tall and slim and blonde ...
Oh, hand me down my jogging shoes today.

The sound was just like rolling thunder
My dog took off with his tail tucked under
I stood at the side of the road and watched 'em pass
Their shirts were nicely under fitted
They all looked terribly dedicated
Some looked strong ... but most looked low on gas
Some were dressed like land-locked whales
Some wore shirts from Bloomingdales
Some had legs that looked like six foot long
They clearly come to "do or die"
And as that herd went thundering by
I swear to God ... they all broke into song ...

Crying, Come on Harry ... come on Sue
Let's do what the magazines tell us to ...