Sounding Brass lyrics
Society frowns on blowing one's own trumpet...
SWANN makes sound of trumpet.
(spoken) Oh, for goodness' sake, would you believe it.
(sung) But we found a game that merits no rebuke.
If someone's got a tub, we're going to thump it.
It's more fun than playing polo with the Duke.
The object is to Gunga Din your neighbour.
"I'm a better man than you"'s the acid test.
So man the good ship one-up,
Let's do a social ton-up,
And bang our social symbols with the best!
Two, three, four
Playing on the status symbols, laying out the ready cash,
Bigger, better, newer, smarter, hear the status symbols clash.
My phone number's ex-directory, should you wish to make a call.
Mine is even more exclusive.
I won't have a phone at all.
(spoken) You can always try cabling me - Mick Flan, England.
I have colour television, though it can't receive a thing.
I've a midget tape recorder, hidden in my signet ring.
(Hidden in my signet ring)
I've a laundress comes in daily, to my flat in Marble Arch.
All my laundry's flown to Cairo!
Flown to where?
Where they don't use so much starch!
I believe my butler's butler
Has appeared on Face to Face.
I lost both my Botticellis
When they robbed my country place.
I've been asked to sing at Salzburg
In next year's Fidelio!
I've been asked to screen Lord Denning:
For security, you know.
My car registration number's
'1111 V I P'.
All my garage doors fly open
When I murmur 'Sesame'.
My car horn goes Ah-E Ah-E,
Your car horn goes Ah-Ah-Ah.
I've just bought a Mini Super.
Bought a what?
A Mini Super.
Oh yes, I've got one in my boot.
Playing on the status symbols,
Laying out the ready cash.
Bigger, Better, Newer, Smarter,
Hear the status symbols clash.
Hell has just been taken over
By a friend of Charlie Clore's!
We've acquired a private furnace.
Bigger, Hotter, far than yours.
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