Evil Cowards Follow

He materialized at the edge of my street,
In a big beater collar,
Never missed a beat,
I can you can say that's all where it began,

He seduced me on my way home from marching band,
It was 1991,
It was the summer of the purple man,

God only knows we didn't know we did,
You bet we played that card because we were just kids,
Re-educated while working on our tans,
He controlled us with a touch of his purple hand,
We we're falling one by one,
It was the summer of the purple man,

Suddenly the universe was out of whack,
And once you go there,
You can't come back,
And daddy look at you he's gonna have a heart attack,
"Commence conscription," he said,

"When I get my hands on that mother fucker,
Gonna put his purple ass in the ground,
And weight the fucker,
I'll tear him limb from limb on a torture rack,"

The afternoons were spent in nap,
The nights were sitting on his lap,
Feeding him purple beans out of a can,
Everything went according to his plan,
It was the last time I had fun,
Yeah, it was the summer of the purple man,

Spilling our seeds into the serpent's garden,
Our young love muscles began to harden,
That's when mother copped and begged our pardon.
Cleared her throat and she said,

"You're such a good little boy,
And you always want to please us,
Surely we can fix this with a little more Jesus,
And pray and pray that purple gay away,"

Hey Nancy boys this ones for you,
And the big pink bow from the gum you chew,
It's such a hoot watching what you turned into,
As the days fly pass,
We'll stand aghast,
Trapping you in a social impasse,
Run out the door just as fast as you can,
And try to go back to the summer of the purple man,